Dating Diaries

Be My Guest: A Q&A on Singleness, Dating and Trusting God

Camry Moore from @ReturnoftheGodlyWoman shares her thoughts on being a single woman in today’s world and how she trusts God with her whole life.

Follow @returnofthegodlywoman on IG
Hey guys, guess what? I have some exciting news! Today on the blog I’ve invited a guest – and friend of mine – to share her thoughts  Q-and-A style on singleness, dating and following God in today’s world – helpful, right?
 I hope you enjoy reading as much as I did! Let me know your thoughts in the comments below and don’t forget to follow Camry on the ‘gram! You can find her at @returnofthegodlywoman and check out her most recent blog posts here.

What’s your name, age & current occupation?

 My name is Camry Moore, I’m an early twenty something year old. Most of the time you’ll find me in an educational setting, sometimes I’m the student and sometimes I’m the teacher, regardless, I pretty much live on my college campus.

Faith story: How did you come to know God? (i.e. what age, what circumstances, did you grow up in the church, etc.) 

I was baptized in the church before I even knew my own name and grew up going to church with my family every time the doors opened. However, as I’m sure you know, there’s a big difference between being a church goer and a Believer. I didn’t come to know who God truly is until I got to college—when the church girl became the wanna be wild girl who was also suffering with depression, anxiety, and heartbreak. I learned who He truly is at the messiest point in my life and I’ve been learning more and more about Him and myself ever since.

Why ‘RETURN OF THE GODLY WOMAN‘?

The world has gotten to a place where being a woman with morals, standards, and Faith is considered “lame”. And many young women have opted to abandon all three of those things in an effort to be accepted by society. So I titled my blog and Instagram page Return of the Godly Woman as a way to sort of announce that we need to come back to our first love—Christ. We need to return to trying to be the women He made us to be.

What’s your blog about? 

My blog is really just a place for me to be used by God in the best ways I know how—and that’s writing and mentorship. Through Christ, I want to be a support system for Christian women. It’s about encouraging obedience to God’s will, purity, allowing God to be our matchmaker, and just generally living a Christ centered life. When I first started with my Instagram page, I didn’t know that God would lead women to my page who would actually feel like I was qualified to give them life advice. I needed the things that I was posting more than anyone, I think. So it was really just encouragement for myself. But God somehow turned it into a big part of my purpose.

What’s something that you’ve leared about yourself in 2016
that you didn’t know? 

What are your goals heading into 2017?  

I definitely plan to get my girls youth mentoring program off the ground and start doing conferences and seminars with teenage girls about Christ, purity, and purpose.

if I like this guy and he’s really nice but he’s not a believer. Should I try and date him anyway? 

A man who knows Christ & recognizes you as a daughter of Christ will treat you like the royalty… Click To Tweet

 I’m trying to figure out how many languages I should say NO in. As daughters of Christ, it’s crucial that we only date men who know, love, respect, and whole heartedly believe in our Father. Yes, a man can be a good man and not necessarily be a man of God, however, knowing Jesus still makes a gigantic difference. A man who knows Christ and recognizes you as a daughter of Christ will treat you like the royalty you are. On top of that, the fear of God is what keeps a Godly man from straying from his marriage or hurting his wife in anyway, not love. Many men have loved their wives and still been disloyal at one point or another because the fact is, without the Holy Spirit, we would all do just about anything. The Holy Spirit is a keeper—it manages those who have it, and when we attempt to do something that would be displeasing to God or when we go through with doing something that He wouldn’t be pleased with, the Spirit convicts us. Non-believers don’t have that experience, which is why this world is full of indecency and obscenity. Godly men have a different type of allegiance and loyalty to Godly women than do regular men because of the spirit that lives within them and the love they have for the Father. Besides, a difference in beliefs can cause a whole host of conflicts in a relationship. What happens when you want to go to church and he doesn’t? What happens when you want to honor God with your body and marriage by abstaining from sex before marriage, and he doesn’t see why you two should do that? The fact of that matter is, there is no substitute for a spiritual connection; there’s nothing that can make up for it. If my explanation isn’t convincing enough, take it from the bible—2nd Corinthians 6:14.

Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?

if I just broke up with my S.O. and want to move on. How do I get over them?

It’s going to take time. Children of God are not immune to pain and heartbreak, we just know that it’s best to give it to Him and let Him take care of it when it comes. And that’s what I suggest you do. Take it all to God in prayer, and ask Him to direct your path. Ask Him to help you to understand whatever He intends for you to learn from it and help you to move forward without looking back. Wrap yourself up in Him and focus on growing closer to Him and becoming who He’s called you to be. And remember that God won’t take something away from you unless you’re not meant to have it. And if it’s not in God’s will for you to be in a relationship with a particular person, then trust me, you don’t want to be in that relationship. Nothing outside of God’s will is worth having.

if I CANNOT take my singleness anymore! What should I do? And is it bad that I just want to be with someone already?! 

Let’s start with the last question. The truth is, as human beings, we all have a desire for companionship; it’s in our nature and it was put there by God. So to an extent, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be with somebody. But there is something wrong with wanting to be with just anybody. If you’ve gotten to the point where you’re so discontent with your singleness that you’re willing to commit to just about anyone, then you’re in trouble. The issue with desperation is that the devil can so easily use it to his advantage. If you decide that you’re fed up with waiting and that you just can’t take the single life anymore, the enemy can very easily convince you that the man who has no interest in pleasing God is worth your time—that the man who pulls you out of God’s will and into premarital sex is an acceptable option. With ease, the enemy can use your desperation to destroy your life by using a counterfeit. And the sad part is, when you’re desperate, it doesn’t even necessarily have to be a believable counterfeit; just anything to fill the empty side of your bed. So what do you do when the desire for companionship becomes overwhelming?

Well first and foremost, seek God, and ask God to reveal your purpose to you. Being single is a time to be busy serving God, pursuing your purpose, and bettering yourself. Understand that God moves at His own pace—and His pace is perfect. When you truly understand that, then you can understand that to rush it in anyway would mean abandoning His perfect will in favor of your own—which would be nothing short of a mistake. Well first and foremost, seek God, and ask God to reveal your purpose to you. Click To Tweet

 So spend your days seeking God and pursuing your purpose boldly. The thing about God is that He has a purpose for everything which means that the husband you’re waiting for is assigned to be your husband for a purpose, not just ‘cause yall would look cute together.

Your husband is meant to be your purpose mate, which means that your purposes will agree in some way and the two of you will help each other along. Waiting for him to show up is not about sitting around and waiting for the day he just happens to come knocking on your door. No, it’s about alignment. It’s about being in position. Waiting is not passive, on the contrary, it’s extremely active because you should be working towards your purpose. If you’re not going after God’s purpose for your life, then you’re not in the fullness of His will. And that’s where a Godly man will find you—in His will. Still, there will be some rough nights. Those are the times that you have to really have a word for your loneliness and for the devil. Those are the times to remind yourself that God has a plan. Sometimes you really just have to talk yourself up and out of that mess.

if I don’t know what to look for. What should I be looking for in a godly relationship or partner? 

In a partner, you should be looking for God and the fruit of His spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). That is the simplest and yet the best way I feel I can answer that question. As far as a relationship, the specifics will vary. But the fruits of the spirit should be evident within how you treat each other as well. A truly Godly man knows how to treat a woman. He will be intentional, there won’t be any games or manipulation involved. He won’t be perfect, but he will try his best to treat you as Christ does because that’s what he’s supposed to do.In a partner, you should be looking for God and the fruit of His spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). Click To Tweet


Please seek out your God given purpose and start working towards that. And I can’t stress enough how important it is to wait on God’s perfect timing. Please stop asking men who don’t know God to love you the way God does. They can’t. Ephesians 5:25 says 
“Husbands love your wives as Christ loves the church and gave himself up for it”. How can a man who isn’t part of the church love you the way Christ does if he doesn’t even know how Christ loves it?

You can find me on Instagram at @ReturnoftheGodlyWoman and on WordPress.com at returnoftheGodlywoman.wordpress.com.

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Leighann

Twenty-something, lover of Jesus. I like animals (esp. dogs), Fun-Fetti cupcakes and yoga. I love God and do my best to love others. I hate too-warm weather and socks that fall into your shoes when you walk. I'm a huge fan of Christian rap and cold, sunny days.

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